I'm sorry in advance.

Thursday, March 31, 2005  > Trackback URL
I'm sorry in advance for my April fools joke...

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Why my cousin needs to shave.

 > Trackback URL
Last Friday my cousin Ryan flew home from Colorado to see his family for Easter. He stopped bye the lovely Amirault homestead because he flew into TF Green and he had a lovely lent dinner that T-Unit slaved hours on (Cheese pizza from Pizza Hut). What was bugging me was what was stuck to his face... Look at that thing, he just can't pull it off.

Nick, (pictured left) can pull of this maneuver. Ryan, not so much. Ryan looks like a serial rapist parked outside a school playground waiting in the back of a 1987 Ford Econoline van with a bowl of candy. It just looks creepy...

Big-Ry, do us all a favor and wipe the dirt off your face. And no, I'm not jealous because I can't grow one. I know i'd look rediculous if I had one.


Leroy is super portable.

 > Trackback URL
Leroy really doesn't care how you pick him up or carry him around. Here's Andrew holding onto Leroy like he's a football. As you can see, Leroy doesn't care. He'd probably stay in that position for 30-40 minutes or unitl he got bored and wanted to threaten the birds in the outside the window from the sink.


Anonymous Anonymous : what the hell is this!!!    

Leroy Amirault

Wednesday, March 30, 2005  > Trackback URL
This cat is mental.
Here is the latest addition to the Amirault family, Leroy. Leroy is a mental case, he runs around the house all day and thinks he is a Dog. He comes when you call his name, he plays fetch, likes to snuggle under your arm when you watch tv and he cries when you leave the house.

Everyone join me in a group "Awwwwwwwwww".

Ohh yeah, he also knaws on the houseplants and sits on the windowsill and screams at the birds on the birdfeeder. T-unit put a birdfeeder in the window so he would have something to watch all day.


Freeskier Magazine Party.

Tuesday, March 29, 2005  > Trackback URL
I love it when boozin shots of me show up on freeskier.com articles! Ha ha ha.
Well, here's a shot that Matt Harvey over at Freeskier Magazine published in their article on the Vermont Freeskiing Open. I had the pleasure of drinking for free that night, courtesey of the magazine and got pretty banged up. I had 4-6 Red-Bull & vodka's, several shots and then some random beers. Needless to say, I was banged up. When I got home I couldn't sleep due to the insane amount of red-bull I drank and proceeded to edit some photos while hammered. They didn't come out all that bad!


SNOW-360 Has the VT Open Shots up.

 > Trackback URL
My Resort Multimedia Consulting website (www.snow-360.com) has 85+ professional shots from the 2005 Vermont Freeskiing Open available. I've also made a cool desktop wallpaper that is also available for download.

I should have the immersive (360) pics from the event up at some point this week. Hang tight, they'll be up. I just need to get a free minute to publish all of them.

Hey, look at me. I'm a professional protographer now. Go me.


Vermont Freeskiing Open Pictures

Sunday, March 27, 2005  > Trackback URL

Ok, so this weekend I was at Stratton for the Vermont Freeskiing Open. The VT Open is the largest and best freeskiing competition in the East. Since Stratton also hosts the US Open for snowboarding they leave the US Open course intact for the VT Freeskiing open. According to Matt from Freeskier the course was better than the X-Games, which is a pretty bold statement, but it was true. The course was super big, shaped to perfection and people were going off!


So I'll start my story on Friday. I spoke with Stratton & Matt from Freeskier Magazine and headed up to Vermont. The people at Stratton & Freeskier were super-cool and hooked it up with a place to crash and a 2 day access pass & lift ticket. Got to Stratton around 10PM after a shitty ass ride, got pulled over on Route 2 and got slapped with a $200 ticket for passing on the right in a climbing lane. Completely bogus, I'm gonna fight it in court. So, got to Stratton and passed out around midnight.


Woke up Saturday to some of the nicest weather ever. Headed out to the comp with Matt & Denise and took around 400 pictures of the comp that day along wiht some rediculous immersive images. I'll post those to snow-360 at some point tonight when I free up. The Slopestyle comp on Saturday was non-stop, they had to run the lifts later that day just to let us finish up the comp. Everyone was super psyched and had an awesome time. After the comp we headed to the main base and the skiers put on an lil' show for the boozhounds at the base lodge. They were doing snowmobile tow-ins on the last jump in the park. It was pretty cool. Around 6PM they had the awards ceremony at the baselodge and we went home to take quick showers and prepare for the Freeskier Magazine afterparty at a local bar in the village.

I'll post more later...


Putting the Pornography back into MMP.

Thursday, March 24, 2005  > Trackback URL
Reason #345345 why having my blog on my server is better than Textamerica.

Ok, let me start things off by saying that you should head over to Al-Jazeera.com and look at this news story.

http://www.aljazeera.com/me.asp?service_ID=7432

Scroll down to the image that I've showcased here in MMP, does anything look strange about the image next to the guy sitting at the main table? Look real close, I'm sure you'll get it.

Yeah, you know someone's head is getting cut off for this one! And just in case Al-Jazeera takes the link down, I've got it available in PDF format. Ha.

http://www.ozskier.com/blog/stupid-aljazeera.pdf

Cradle of civilization my ass.



The Asian tea bong...

Wednesday, March 23, 2005  > Trackback URL

So I've got a new client, you may have seen them recently, they bought 35k worth of Dell hardware and pretty much required 3 weeks of my time. Kevin from the office is a huge fan of tea and he has this snazzy contraption that looks like a crazy bong, but it just boils up some delicious Asian tea leaves for you to enjoy. It looks like it is straight out of a crack lab and tea is the last thing you'd expect it to make. After much smack talking and doubt Kevin finally shut me up by brewing up a batch. If I was going to drink tea, this would how I would do it up. Mostly because it looks like drug parafinalia and is an awesome conversation piece.


I guess if you stop drining tea you can always smoke out of it. Yeah thats the ticket.




I HATE THE DENTIST!

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So here I am at the dentist. I hate going to the dentist. You sit there on your back like a dead hooker with your mouth open while some stranger picks at your teeth with a miniature sickle. Yeah, sign me up for this shit. So I get in there and get the 3rd degree as to why I haven't been there in a year. Then I begin to explain to the dental hygenist that while I hold her in the utmost respect, I completely hate coming to see her and that it is the bane of my life to make appointments. I would seriously prefer to schedule myself in every 6 months to get kicked in the crotch by a Scottish soccer player than go to the god damn dentist.


Ohh yeah, no cavities. Take that dental industry, no drilling in this face-hole.


Ha ha Rocket, someone stole your whip.

 > Trackback URL
From the "It is awesome to see bad things happen to assholes" file comes this story...

Clemens' Hummer stolen in Houston
Pitcher's son left car unlocked after driving to school
The Associated Press
Updated: 4:57 p.m. ET March 23, 2005

HOUSTON - Roger Clemens’ orange Hummer — a present from the New York Yankees for his 300th win — was stolen Wednesday after the pitcher’s son drove it to school and left it unlocked, police said.


School district police issued a statewide all-points bulletin about the Hummer, taken from Memorial High at about 8:30 a.m. The vehicle contained all of Koby Clemens’ baseball equipment for the school team.

“I talked with Roger about it a little,” said Chuck Brawner, chief of the Spring Branch Independent School District police. “That Hummer was given to him by the New York Yankees for his 300th win.”

Brawner said Clemens, who was at spring training with the Houston Astros in Florida, was offering a $10,000 reward for the vehicle’s return and information about who took it.

Roger Clemens couldn’t immediately be reached for comment by The Associated Press. He earned his 300th victory in 2003 with the Yankees, then joined the hometown Astros.

He began letting Koby Clemens drive the orange Hummer to school after he signed a letter of intent last November to play baseball for the University of Texas, whose colors are burnt orange and white. Before that, Koby drove a black Hummer to school.

Hummers can range from $50,000 to more than $100,000.


Anonymous Anonymous : What a gigantic tool. Huge, huge tool. Biggest tool ever.    

Holy F*CK Breckenridge!

 > Trackback URL
Mike took a couple pics in Breckenridge, now these jumps are insanity.
I wouldn't hit these in a million years. Even straightlining, these are not do-able. I'll hit the 80 footer at Mount Snow, but this jump is just nuts. You need an air traffic controller to nail these wedges.

Holy crap, all of a sudden the 100 footer at mount snow doesn't seem that large. Then again the snowpack here back east is like boilerplate and out west it is like landing in a pile of dead kittens. Wait a minute, are dead kittens soft?

North 205 Memories...

 > Trackback URL
Here's your throwback picture of the day. Would anyone else kill to be back there? I know I would. Here's a splendid memory from North 205, well not from North 205, but from outside North 205. We used to drag the tv and couch outside to watch baseball games or play PS2/Xbox. Ha. Keep in mind, we lived on the 2nd floor.

I now have the ability to easily publish zillions of images from College. This is going to be dangerous.

Anonymous Anonymous : I remember when you did that, could see ya from down by the LLC! I'm afraid the ground is all sorts of soggy out there right now, and I doubt the current residents will have the same level of dedication/drunkenness as you guys did to carry on such a fine tradition... :(    

Baseball season is almost here...

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Baseball season is almost here, can't freakin wait.


It takes a keen eye...

Tuesday, March 22, 2005  > Trackback URL
So I'm expanding into Judging now...
Sunday I judged the Freeride Frenzy at Wachusett Mountain. Since my shins and knees are a mess this season I'm taking it easy and sitting this year out and figured that if I'm not gonna win the competition I might as well judge it. So I got on the horn with wawa last week and they were stoked to have another judge.

It really sucks that my legs are a mess, I could have totally won this comp for the 4th year in a row but I just can't risk damaging my knees or shins anymore. I'm gonna come back stronger than ever next year so that will be good.

The comp went off and everyone had a good time. We had a photo shoot afterwards that was even more fun than the comp. Here are a couple pics of me sitting around judging. Nothing too exciting, I wasn't wasted or anything so this really isn't a crazy post. Just figured I would keep you all in the loop as to what was going on in my rockin' existance.





Steve was hungry...

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Steve came over on Saturday night and on the way down to my place he felt a little hungry, so he stopped into a mini mart with the hopes of finding some good food to nosh on. Keep in mind the mini mart that he went into has everything under the sun, premade sandwiches, canned goods, frozen dinners, etc. So what does Steve decide to get, he gets a loaf of bread and some butter. I kid you not. How completely freakin random is that, bread and butter. He could have had doritos, chips, pretzels, Momma Celeste... But no, Steve opted for the Wonder Bread and a stick of Land-O-Lakes. Classic Steve, once again showing us that you are the most completely random individual that I know.

Hey, at least he was drinking a beer.



Anonymous Anonymous : mmmm wonder bread is amazing for munchies    

Will you take a check?

Monday, March 21, 2005  > Trackback URL

Most of you MMP junkies know that I have a bar in my kitchen called Shenanigans. Well, the bar was open this Saturday night for Kat's birthday bash. Many of you that have been over know that we've got a gigantic mirror behind the bar that people stick autographed $1 bills to whenever they get their first well drink at the bar. So, Kat got her first well drink at Shenanigans and didn't have $1... So she cut is a freakin' check. That's a doozer.

She was smart to rip off the routing numbers in that check, you could certainly have some fun with those digits.

Justin and I are in the process of adding a mag-stripe reader to the bar so you can just swipe your credit card and sign the reciept and hang it on the bar. Now that's convenience!




Extra points because she made the check out to North 205.


Snow-360, hard at work.

Sunday, March 20, 2005  > Trackback URL
As some of you are well aware, I was judging a competition at Wachusett today. After the comp I threw a little photo session for their marketing department. Pictures and immersives (360 pics) should be up on wachusett.com at some point this week.

For the time being you can peep one of the immersives at....
www.snow-360.com

(Damn, I'm a web-content machine!)

360 lens hack.

 > Trackback URL
Here's a sweet pic I snagged by holding the 360 lens at a different angle while riding the lift. Brendan and I are lookin' super cool here while the joey in the red jacket looks like a super tool. On the lift ride was complaining that the snow was too soft, he was also mumbling some other crap but I couldn't make it out through his broken English and incoherent ramblings.


I wish I was skiing...

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Man, it is 11:15 at night and this photo makes me really wish I was skiing. Ohh wait, I am getting up at 7 AM to judge a competition at Wachusett and have a photo shoot. Rock...

I wish i was skiing.


About to ride Mount Snow...

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Bluebird sky, warm temperatures, Inferno terrain park... Classic Mount Snow.





Whoah, the weather is perfect.

Saturday, March 19, 2005  > Trackback URL

Whoah, the weather is perfect. 100+ mile view and a buttload of snow, this is going to be the nastiest last day of Winter ever. Goggle tan, here I come!


today is going to be awesome

 > Trackback URL

Only a few more weekends left in the season, time to make it happen at Mount Snow today. In the background you see Haystack, which is closed for the season because nobody skis there and ASC needs to get their shit together and sell it so we can get a new summit chair at Mt Snow.



Driving to mount snow...


hungover drive

 > Trackback URL

Driving to mount snow hungover yet again


40oz to freedom.

Friday, March 18, 2005  > Trackback URL

Steel Reserve beer , 40oz, $1.75, 8.5% alcohol, 100% fun. Something tells me that getting up early for Vermont is going to suck ass tomorrow.


Anonymous Anonymous : Nice. Steel Reserve made one of my roomates puke for 14 hours my senior year.    

Blogger J : dude you are a commando    

Anonymous Anonymous : this is my firt time drinking steel, i'm just finishing off my second 16 and i have a pretty god buzz.i seen where alot of people talk shit about the steel, but i think its ok, espically for the price.drink and be maerry    

Rusty and his Pope hat

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Note rusty's liquor store pope hat and steel reserve fourty ounce


Jeff Slinn's St Patrick's Day Shenanigans.

 > Trackback URL
Dave Amirault: is that a bum?
Dave Amirault: with a tattoo
Jeff Slinn: lol
Jeff Slinn: yea
Dave Amirault: nice work
Jeff Slinn: gurl sitting behind us last night
Jeff Slinn: st patty's day crack
Dave Amirault: so you were all skeezey and stuck a cameraphone down her ass?
Jeff Slinn: basically yes
Jeff Slinn: but i did it james bond style...





Sk8in For The Lord : Give me a break.

 > Trackback URL

<<- Begin retarded article from the New York Times

ELIJAH stood atop the quarter-pipe on his skateboard, a lithe prophet in an electric-pink T-shirt. Below the curved ramp, a group of fresh-faced skate kids, their own boards under their arms, stared up at him in awe. "Dude, you can do it!" cried the kids, aged 12 to 15. "I know I can," called down Elijah, a 25-year-old professional skateboarder with major sideburns. "And I say that out of confidence, not cockiness." With that, he shot down the quarter-pipe, hurtled across the church courtyard and up a wedge ramp into the open air, his board flipping 360 degrees beneath him before his feet found its top again and he landed smoothly on a receiving ramp. "Awesome!" the chorus of kids called out. "That was rad!" Another skater might have basked in the praise. But Elijah - Elijah Moore, that is, a skate evangelist from Garland, Tex. - and the 14 other members of the King of Kings Skateboard Ministries team are quick to say that they do not skate for adulation or even for the thrill of catching big air. They skate for Jesus.

-->> End retarded article from the New York Times .

Ok, give be a freakin' break here. This has got to be the dumbest thing I've heard today. You know what, from now on, I'm freestyle skiing for the Jeez... Yeah, that's it. From now on, nothing but Christ when I'm tearing through a terrain park, he'll give me the infinite strength and wisdom I need to throw a perfect switch cork 900 tail. And the dumbest shit about this story, it says that they don't skate for the adulation or the thrill of catching big air, they skate for Jesus. I'm sure that Jesus really gives a rats ass that you're dropping 13 foot quarter pipes and nosepressing rails for him. Please, if you want to do something for Jesus why don't you fucking volunteer some fucking time to help those in need instead of skating around a fucking park you gen-x loser. Wow, that was harsh.


St. Patrick's Day Away Messages

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Here's an interesting little entry for you all...
As you are all well aware, yesterday was St.Patricks day, a prime example of how Boston/New England can take a simple and innocent holiday and transform it into an orgy of alcohol and debochery, man I love Boston. Since so many of you were enjoing yourselves yesterday I decided to do a little away message sniping and post some of the better ones here in MMP. So here you go people, some of the most choice St.Patricks day away messages from my buddy list.

This could be your 15 minutes of fame!

(Once again, multi-image single post rocks!)


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Justin Duquette, Wine Funneler.

 > Trackback URL

Well, I'm going to be taking advantage of the multi photo blog post today with this doozie of an entry. Here's Justin funneling wine? Yeah, I don't know what he was thinking either. He got home super late one night this week and I was sitting around and enjoing the Jack Bauer
Power Hour and he just decided to join me in a glass of wine. After Justin got tired of sipping he concocted some sort of miniature funnel and continued to funnel a glass of White Zin.

Good work Duke, way to speed drink some 4 dollar wine. Ha.

I've been itching to use multi-image single post, so here we go.


The Duke creates some sort of mini funnel. We'll call her, gulp-jr.


And the wine begins to flow.


Finishing up Gulp-Jr. The look in Justin's eyes says "Why the hell did I just funnel 4 dollar wine?"


A nice after shot.


And Justin raising Gulp-Jr nice n' high for her first inaugural funnel.


Welcome to the new & improved MMP.

Thursday, March 17, 2005  > Trackback URL
Hey everyone,
Welcome to the new Mischief, Mayhem & Pornography. This just another step I'm taking to make sure that MMP is the best it can be. I've moved MMP off of textamerica.com and onto the ozskier.com server, this is so I can have more creative control over content, layout, advertising and merchandising.

I'm very thankful for textamerica.com and the 18 or so months that MMP was living on their server, but as we all know, all good things must come to an end. It was with great hesistation that I left their services. I've made some great friends there and had some awesome opportunites to learn more about css coding and blogging and I will always be greatful for that.

As for MMP, I'm still working on carrying over all the old posts. I've made it to mid December of 2004, so that takes me right up to Christmas and when I went on vacation. I'll be working hard over the next month to get all the old posts back up and indexed into the new MMP on ozskier.com.

There are some changes to note with the new blog...
  1. Anyone can post comments! That's right, you no longer need a textamerica login to post comments to MMP.
  2. You no longer have to dive back 100+ pages to find content you want, I'll be installing a search feature so you can browse by topic, name, etc.
  3. You can look up posts by month. On the right hand side you can see that the new MMP auto archives itself so you can quickly look up individual months. I'll soon have it set to weeks so you can be even pickier.
  4. No more annoying advertisements, well, for the time being. I'll have advertisements in here at some point, but I'll be making the moola off of them ;-)
So thats it, welcome to the new MMP. Update your bookmarks, ditch the old http://ozskier.textamerica.com address and update your bookmarks to http://www.mischiefmayhemandpornography.com or http://www.ozskier.com/blog.

Welcome to the future of MMP.
-Dave

P.S.- Let me know what you think of the new blog, post a comment!

Anonymous Anonymous : me gusta mucho.    

Happy St. Patrick's Day.

 > Trackback URL
Happy St. Patrick's Day. Notice the green shirt and the "Kiss Me I'm Drunk" stickie note. That is just to put all the ladies on notice, c'mon ladies! Wow, I'm wearing a sport-jacket, now that's classy. Sucks that I've got to work today, Walsh tried to make me take the day off so I could booz all day but I don't think that is a viable excuse to use during tax season to get the day off.

And now here's a joke that my Grandfather tells every St.Patricks day..

"What is a mile long, green in color and has over 1,000 assholes?
Boston St. Patrick's Day Parade."


Sox tickets came in...

Wednesday, March 16, 2005  > Trackback URL
Yeah, so I'm going to a few Sox games this season. Ha.

Anonymous Anonymous : Sweet!! I finally got some tix to opening day this year :)    

Blogger Dave Amirault : Ha ha ha, I think not dudette!    

Driving to Mount Snow, hungover.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005  > Trackback URL
Don't I just look fantastic, driving to Mount Snow really hungover at 7AM. Yeah, wicked glam.
Someone remind me why it was a good idea to drink til 1:30 in the morning and slam down 8-10 cold rocks and then get up at 7AM and drive to the mountain?

This just goes to show all of you that I am absolutly insane when it comes to skiing and I will do whatever it takes to get my ass up to that freakin' mountain to ride. Did I also mention the fact that it was snowing like a mo-fo that morning and the roads were covered.


Red Sox Players Get Fab Makeover

 > Trackback URL
Ohh no, looks like those tv queers from that gay makeover show have gotten their hands on Damon, Mirabelli, V-Tek and Wakefield.

Boston.com has the story and if you aren't illiterate you can read it.

Looks like my TiVo is going to think I'm gay for recording this episode.

On a side note, I think V-Tek should jam a glove in that pink shirt dude on the left, the Cressley (sp?) guy. You know, just like what he did to A-Rod. They're both gay, right?